have i lost them all?

haven’t been updating. and that’s due to the fact that i have been away on a roadtrip to malaysia (my gradtrip) with lifang, yb, junming and shihong. just returned late last night actually.

just came back from isetan office attire shopping with my mum. bought 3 new pants, and 3 jackets from theme. major sale u see…and since i’m starting work in 11 days’ time, it’s really a timely sale and an even more timely buy. mum paid for the clothes, and since it’s shihong’s bday tmr, i bought a ashworth wallet for him as well. hmm…mum paid first and of course, i paid her back. but somehow, things seemed a little different recently. i don’t know if i’m plain sensitive, or i’m just really not used to being independent, away from daddy and mummy’s loving care. i’m having the feeling that i’m really growing up, and leaving their comfortable and soothing loving arms. and that scares me. the fact that i’m growing up, starting work, having to start earning and living on my own means scares me. it’s really not about the money, but the fact that i’m growing up, or rather grown up. it’s a huge uncertainty and i guess it scares me as much as it might scare others.  

anw, on a lighter note, gradtrip (12th may - 20th may) was a hell lot of fun! visited places like melaka, ipoh (met up with vincent from blk B), ayer tawar (met up with david from blk E and visited the turtle hatchery =D), cameron highlands, langkawi, penang island (met up with boohung) and butterworth (met up with jungkiat and even stayed at his place!). it was a great experience travelling with close good friends and even having the chance to visit their hometowns. i’ve had the chance to have a deeper understanding of myself as well as my friends. travelling really makes friends closer as u really have the chance to live with them, and learn every tiny bits of his/her habits. it makes u able to learn, tolerate, accept. this allows friends to forge a deeper understanding and stronger relationship with one another. i’m so glad to have been part of this wonderfully tremendous trip. :) we mini-celebrated shihong’s bday with a small card, cake and bday song (sang in the softest of all whispers). don’t be mistaken, we had to sing it softly as we were celebrating it at 2am in jungkiat’s room and his parents were already sleeping! lol. it was really happie seeing shihong sincerely surprised and happy. afterall, it’s the first time ”we friends” celebrated his bday with him, for him. 

words alone do no just to the hospitability shown to us by boohung, jungkiat and his parents. their sincerity in bringing us all around penang, tasting good food, durian and showing us around the place touched me. it is the hospitability and the sincerity that i don’t see in city people anymore. practicality have snatched away that side of city-people and for that, i pity all of us. simplicity is something money can’t buy, and reality plays heavy tricks on us that we fall blindly into such traps. hopefully i do not lose that much of myself and humanity as i slowly set foot into the working society.

it is always great to indulge in humanity and emotions. afterall, that’s what makes us human. that’s what differentiates us.     

so that’s how it all ended.

so that’s how it all ended.

nus and sheares hall life ended with a bang on the last night of my hall stay (8th may 2008). drug delivery was my final paper; which ended on the 6th. i heaved a sigh of relief after the paper. not that it was easy and i did well. but that finally, all the exams were over. for good this time round. all the 16 years of education to a nice firm end.

together with design II group mates as well as ruoling, we had a PARTY in hall. lifang’s room, to be exact. which we subsequently laughed, joked, thanked each other. frankly the whole episode was just one which featured the closeness of bonds, friendships and the type of relationship between close pals, group mates, … neighbours. for 4 years, we have lived with each other. grown to assimilate to each other. learnt to accept each other. and somehow, being around each other is like part of life.

when i think back on that night (8th may), all i could recall was crazy vodka mixes, kahlua, red wine, chips, JELLIES, laughters, joy, FUN and a tinge of unwillingness. to leave hall, to leave friends, to close this wonderfully amazing chapter of our lives.

of course, things that happened during the party is a secret and it would stay that way. but it’s really a whole different experience totally letting my guards down and showing others the real true side of yourself. i mean, it takes really good friends to show them the ugly side of you when u’re drunk rite?

i would never forget the crazy jelly war between ruoling, lifang and myself. and of course, the crazy things that haohao did when he’s drunk. yb and his pail. jungkiat and his “it’s the last beer…” shihong took care of us. and i love him so much for that.

thinking back, school was loads of fun. and that was only made possible by these close friends i’ve made in my uni life. i sincerely thank them for being there for me and all they have done for me. more so, i’m utterly grateful to have been able to know this bunch of great pple. and now, i can only hope for these friendships to be able to withstand the vast changes that will soon fall upon us. the new uncertain future which scares us so much.

as i finally move back home. i know this time it’s for real. i won’t be staying in sheares hall anymore. and as hard it was to move into sheares initially, it’s now hard leaving it; and to relocate my equilibrium of staying at home. i can’t help but feel lonely as i sit in my room recalling all the happy moments in school. and it’s soo true. i can never open my room door, turn right, walk 3 steps and storm into lifang’s room anymore. neither will she be able to do that. i’ll definitely miss the late night wee hours of talking and chit-chatting. leaving hall has affected me more than i thought it would. i’m missing my friends……..

and as i type this alone in my room, i hope somehow, i have left an everlasting impression in them. one that would be sufficient for them to call me out periodically for a drink. a chit-chat. or even just to enjoy each other’s company.

i miss my friends. i miss hall. i miss school. but i know exciting future lies ahead of us. and hope that we’ll all find our little heaven amongst the common mortal world. may we find peace and meaning in every step we take.   

you won’t believe it. but yes yes, i just signed up and paid for the SHAPE 5km run!!!! haha, even thou it was mainly for friends (lifang + ruoling) as well as for the seemingly wonderful and attractive goodie bag that comes with it, i’m surprised to be actually quite excited abt the run too~! i mean, after having stopped running totally for like a total 4 years, it would be quite amazing really to see myself put the running shoes to the test all over again. hahaaa..and not to mention, i still have a brand new pair of beautiful adidas running shoes in my cupboard!

ok, all that fun shall come later. after the dreadful final of the finals. not to mention, the malaysia grad trip!

while waiting for laundry

yup, while i’m waiting for my laundry to be done, decided to update this little space of mine.

20th April 2008: nose bled for the 2nd time in my life (first time was back in p5). terrified sh actually pulled out the whole chunk of tissue from the tissue box in his awful panic which he still refuses to admit till now…haa. prior to that, design II group met at famous holland v zi cha for our sumptuous victory treat by our leader! well, on the whole, the day was quite bad actualli. had a totally awful fight with sh. was bad. really quite bad… but wells, we’re alright ok fine again.. so i guess it’s still fine to have quarrels at times just as long as they don’t come too often..hee

21st April 2008: nothing special happened.

22nd April 2008: started off the morning at national skin center to try see a skin specialist without appointment. saw the doc in the end and was given new medications for my thigh rash (the last time i was at the NSC was a long time back in 1991 –> serious drug allergies to septrin, sulfur based drugs). was supposed to join the Year4FUN for the dinner at sheares MPSH. but decided i couldn’t join them due to the massive amt of HR readings and lecture notes that i have yet to cover for the thursday (24th April) exam. sh an i ended up being ponded by the ponding gang (consists of lifang, ruoling, chio, wendy, jung kiat, junming, ahbi…and those whom i didn’t get to see while i was being dragged for the soap bathe ) it was fun having a back-flash to those year 1 freshie days. =) time flies…really.

anw, i’m abt time to collect my laundry. sheares laundry realli takes foreverly long. 2 hrs for wash and 2 hrs for dryer. arghh. but oh wells, i won’t have a chance to do laundry here much longer anyway huh.

signing off.

operation de cock

…roach….yes yes. cockroach.  this isn’t the one i gruesomely murdered. but it certain looked just the same as this one. just that it was in the upside-down orientation when it suffered a seemingly heavy blow to its head which led to its ‘fall from height’ and ‘paralysis’. two further blows sent it straight to heaven.

imagine this. u wake up sleeping with the lights on again. face down because you were supposed to have been reading an article on bed. u edge yourself out of that “predicament”, throw your arms at the blinds, ramaging for the strings to draw them shut.

then tada! it’s right there staring back at you. hmm by the way, i’m sinfully horrified by the simple presence of cockroaches. i’m even having problems spelling the word out and i think i’m having post traumatic syndromes…

so u plan your murder. starting right from the murder weapon –> my black and white slipper which i wrap over with a volume of SHaddup (sheares hall magazine). not because SHaddup deserves that fate, but just simply because i was soo damn scared and it was the only thing thick enough to provide a good protection for my slipper yet strong enough to delivery a fatal blow. then, u start shifting everything on the table. pulling ALL your stuffs to one side, clearing floor space to plan your escape route if IT should fall on the floor and start scrambling about, or worse still, decide to take flight (or in simple terms, fly). u mini-plan your approach route. but that’s all fake coz when u’re the one doing the real thing, u just W-A-C-K!!!

the above planned scenarios don’t happen. the cockroach (difficulty in spelling it out again.) just thuds to the ground. but u noe no matter wat happens, your escape route plan goes on as usual. u literally fly to the bed, something that elevates you from ground lvl.

anyway, after the murder, u decide u have to get rid of evidence. nope, u did not pick up the roach using a tissue. but yes, u scooped it up using SHaddup. fish out the smallest plastic bag you can get and slide the roach into it. throw it into the dustbin with everything else you deem dirty and throwable. and u’re done. i mean…i’m done. happy to have been brave (or perhaps it’s just me.. ) afterall, it’s the first roach that died becoz of me. i have just been added onto the murder list. so all cockroaches, beware. *victory sign*

 *P.S.: i did think of using an insect repellant. but i reckon that would take too long, and the roach might disappear beyond sight if i had left my room in search for one.

retail therapy is BAD?? i beg to differ :) :) :)

accompanied shihong for his medical checkup at jurong S.A.T.A. today. period. don’t realli wanna dwell too much on the crowded, nasty place, with vivid noises of male nurses asking person after person to breathe in deep breaths while radiologists pass harmful rays thru one’s body; just to obtain some x-ray idea of wat’s happening inside u. that might be a mouthful of w o r d s for u to digest. but well, that’s me. i tend to write and write and write everything all into one sentence. and that’s what i totally can’t do in my HR exam this coming thurs if i’m hoping to write a decent paper to exhibit my fabulous communcation skills…bleah :/

well, aside from that. we went shopping after that of course! haha…having been cooped up in hall and bogged down by all that assignments and projects and presentations etc. anw, we went to jurong entertainment center (where i bumped into weiting =p). to cut the long story short, we caught 3 stitches (i mean lilo and stitch, stitch) at the arcarde…after feed abt 13 dollar coins into the money sucking and excitement generating machine. at the end, we traded 2 stitches for one “mickey good luck mouse”

we oso visited IMM and clementi central where i oso bought a fabulously nice and gorgeous shell necklace and 4 spag-strap tees.

but well, the highlight of the day for me came right after my last lecture as an undergraduate in nus. chee seng called, and told me i was counter-offered a post as a investment analyst instead of a territorial manager…~! i now have an office in harbourfront! whee~ =D it’s realli a very good position and i really hope to be able to do well in it! =)

aniwaes, it was realli a big pressie for me. and i really hope that it will all be fixed and kinda stabilized. i like my new job allocation! more so, for some of my friends who have yet to find themselves a suitable job, i hope they continue having faith and may they all find themselves careers which they aspire to be. *let’s share the love* <3

 

Design II. over and done with! :)

*yay* finally all the long nights are over and done with! as u can possibly imagine…we’ve all been lacking sleep for the past few nights. esp shihong - he was compiling a 386 page report! *diaoz* (something totally unsuitable for the faint hearted). i think he’s as “zonked” as can be already. hee

anw, after rushing to meet the 6pm deadline today, i found my way to co-op (forum)! or rather, co-op was the only shopping place for a tired soul like me.

so here’s wat i bought!  i oso got graduation gifts for my close friends =) realli hope they’ll like it…here’s a family potrait of them! let’s hope everyone keeps in touch and stays close~

adorable aren’t they?

having faith, and trusting the trustables…

let me see, 19 (3+6+4+2+4) years of my life as a student will be coming to an end soon. i’ve long forgotten whether i’m happie that this day is finally arriving, or otherwise. life as a student hasn’t really been that much of a fun for me, as for the rest of you (i suppose). as a child, dad and mum sent me for loads of enrichment classes, on top of regular school classes. i really have to extend my utmost thanks and gratitude to my everdearest parents. for bringing me up and giving me the best that they can. for sincerely loving me with all the heart. and for having to tolerate my bads, yet never giving up on me. daddy and mummy, i love you both! very very much…

schooling has been more of an “achievement session” for me. right from primary sch till JC, my aims at school have been more results-oriented. it was only in uni, that i managed to cast that aside for brief moments in my life. as i close this chapter of my life and move on to another, i’m afraid i’ll miss schooling and the fun it brings. the friends and soul mates i have met and those who have stayed on with me through the good and bad times. i’ll miss staying in sheares, miss having supper at the wee hours. miss having neighbours i can disturb at any time of the day, night, watsoever.

i can’t bear to leave actually. the future hones unknowns and uncertainties and i realli hope that u guys will be around forever. as we embark on our first jobs, the selection process, the decision making process and the stepping foot out into society, the real world, i hope we’ll all have faith and trust in watever that made us make the decisions we made, are going to make, or will make. 

it is fate we met. and by choice we became friends. i luv you guys…and no matter how far apart we would be in future, let’s make it a point to meet and keep in touch. contact and update each other with gossips, just like we do now. :)

to all my teachers, lecturers, professors, supervisors, really wanna say a BIG THANK YOU~! 

polyvore…

chanced upon a fabulous site. my new craze and definitely a place to let my creativity and feelings run free.

presenting my creations “in awe”, “gniy.” and “the works of nature and nurture”… hope u like them =)

to those whom i have forsaken, & those who have forsaken me.

it is a pity that we can’t continue our journey. it’s a pity our paths once crossed and never seem to be able to intersect again.

to those whom i meet or bump into occasionally on the streets yet never feel like going up to say hi to, i hope u guys still remember me. and hopefully one day, when we meet each other again, we’ll have the courage or the faith to greet one another. or maybe even meet for tea, or at least keep in contact.

the world is vast. but it becomes scarily big when u feel that friends turn strangers and people u were once so close to have forsaken you forever…

“忽然一场阵雨,世界缩为屋檐.你熟悉的侧脸,回头就在眼前.

一分神丢了手里烟,坠落了燃烧的岁月,让画面再接回从前,省略了昨天的昨天.

后来的你好吗?有比较快乐吗?我应该高兴吧?却又说不上话…

我们是两条平行线,再没有任何交叉点.只留下心酸的感觉,当爱是仓促的句点…” 

 

 

“sadness makes me feel human.” - ying